Fitting into Support Groups with an Age Gap

Question: I consider myself to be fairly young for a polio survivor (I’m in my 30s). I would like to meet other polio survivors near me. There is a support group where I live, but I worry about the age gap and whether I’ll fit in.

Response from Rhoda Olkin, PhD: Entering any group that knows each other can be intimidating. But there is much to gain in meeting and hearing from others who survived polio. And of course, you may find much in common, as well as several differences.

Having polio more recently and being younger than most polio survivors means that there are probably several differences besides current age. You might be from another country that received the vaccine later. Or you might be from a religion that doesn’t endorse vaccines. You may be more mobile and active because of your youth, or you may be just beginning to experience and come to terms with some new symptoms of post-polio syndrome. You might be raising children who are still in the home, or be in your peak working years.

And being younger puts you in a different cohort than older folks. Many of us over 65 were raised in the era of “use it or lose it.” We pushed ourselves hard, only to enter the more recent era of “conserve it to preserve it.”

Having pointed out the differences, here are some of the similarities. Many of us experience pain and are masters of pain management. Some have histories of trauma associated with the polio onset, recovery and medical procedures. We know about relevant disability laws and can spot curb cuts fifty feet away. Some of us use mobility devices, from canes to crutches to scooters to manual or electric wheelchairs. We fall into a generally higher income bracket than people with other types of disabilities and have higher rates of marriage. We use some “insider” terms such as “polios” or “chairs” (wheelchairs). We struggle as we age with signs of growing older, but we enter this phase with some expertise in workarounds and fall prevention techniques.

I can appreciate the worry about fitting in (I worry about this and I’m the same age as many people at the meetings!). But I hope it won’t stop you from going to meetings. There is little to lose (an hour or two) and much to be gained.

Post-Polio Health (Vol. 38, No. 1, Winter 2022)