Anxiety Regarding Returning to Normal Life Amidst a Pandemic

Question: I think I’m experiencing a bit of pandemic fatigue. I know that I don’t have many good years left to travel and be active, yet I realize it’s not very safe to do so right now. I’ve seen many of my friends return to normal life even though cases are still high. I don’t think I’m ready to do that, and it’s causing me a lot of anxiety.

Response from Stephanie T. Machell, PsyD: It sounds like you’re afraid that by the time you feel it’s safe to travel and be active, your good years for doing so will be completely, or nearly, gone. It also sounds like watching your friends getting on with their lives is causing you to feel like you’re missing the fun you imagine them having, and that wondering when you’ll feel ready to join them and/or berating yourself for not being ready is making your anxiety worse.

People’s risk tolerance varies. Unlike you, your friends are comfortable with the risks involved in returning to “normal” life. Because risk tolerance is a personality trait, it is unlikely that you can change yours.

It’s hard not to focus on all you wish you could do, everything you miss doing, and when things will return to “normal,” especially if you’re also focused on how many “good” years you will have left when it does (something it’s unlikely you or anyone else actually knows for certain). Shifting the focus away from these things is unlikely to get rid of all your anxiety, but it will reduce it. Rather than trying to force the worries away, accept them as normal during uncertain times and let them be. Or write them down and save them for a scheduled “worry time” of 15 minutes each day.

Then put the focus on what you can enjoy right now. If you’re tired of your usual routines and activities, try something new. There are a multitude of virtual options available, including concerts, theatre and dance performances, lectures and classes on every topic imaginable, and groups for people with shared interests. There are even virtual tours that allow you to preview the places you might like to visit when that becomes possible. The skills needed to find and access these activities are well within the reach of even the most technophobic. If there are in-person activities that are within your comfort level, make time to do those.

Feeling more in control may help, too. If you haven’t already, think about what would make you feel safe enough to resume specific activities. Consider whether the enjoyment an activity will provide is greater than the anxiety it may provoke and give yourself permission to forego those that make you uncomfortable. Don’t allow others to pressure you or make you feel bad that your choices differ from theirs.

Also consider when travel might feel comfortable for you again, as well as whether there is any kind of travel that feels safe now. Use this time to research locations and develop itineraries. If your concerns about travel becoming more difficult are more than ageist and ableist assumptions, plan to take more difficult or extended trips sooner. If booking future travel now would help you feel better, look into cancellation policies and travel insurance. And remember, the money you’ve saved not traveling during the pandemic may allow you to take the trip (or trips) of your dreams!

Post-Polio Health (Vol. 38, No. 1, Winter 2022)